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It's Time to Jump! Jump 3: Chapter 1

It’s Time to Jump

Jump 3: Chapter 1: From Presidency to Gauntlet Range

As we stepped into the warehouse I dound myself regressing back into a child and losing the drawback induced pains in my legs. I noted that Cristine didn’t change other than regressing by perhaps five years in age while Angelica just giggled and said some baby gibberish.

“You know, most jumper wait with family founding until they their twentieth jump, if they have children at all.” Turning around I saw Jump-chan standing there, with a raised eyebrow. “It’s not my call, really, but you realize that any offspring you have are counted as Companions, so this little ball of sunshine may eventually become very powerful, especially with you loading her up already.” Noted the goddess, smiling softly at my little daughter who just giggled, reaching a little hand out to her.

“I know, but Cristine wanted us to have a baby with her being the First Lady and all. Not that I’d complain or anything.” I stated, noting that I seemed a tad older than last time, weird.

“Well, I think you need a timeout, and I also hope you don’t plan on giving little Angelica any more siblings for the time being, this is a PG13 jump.” Noted the goddess and I blinked, I had a rating?

Shaking my head and ignoring the odd revelation of such, knowing that she was likely marketing me as an entertainment show or something, I put away the last of the merchandise (read items) that I had personally produced, including the various games, then turned to her.

“So, I have a family now, am 39 and will go back home to being nine if I wanted to. What’s next?” I asked, looking at Jump-chan with a raised eyebrow.

Said deity was giggling. “Oh I like your attitude. As for what is next, I thought I may give you a challenge that pays off more than, well, what happened back there. A bit rough but you certainly did use what you had within reason even.” Stated Jumpchan and led me to the jumping machine, or whatever it was called. It now looked kinda like a Arcade Machine to be honest. With a big, fat “GAUNTLET” written on the side.

“Gauntlet? Isn’t that like those documents where you get no CP and have to take the drawbacks, but you get some kinda reward afterward?” I asked, thanks general idea on the various documents out there.

“Correct. You will be doing gauntlets next, you can choose which ones you take and how many, but you have to take at least two of them. In exchange I give you 400 CP for each instead of the standard rules, since these tend to be rather short.” Explained Jump-chan and I frowned, well, that was a thing. “Also, you have to take at least one of them, and as I stated before, only 400 CP may be allocated to a Gauntlet from your account.” Stated Jump-chan and I sighed, obviously.

“Well, not like I can chainfail with those.” I finally conceded with the decision and sat down before the machine.

“One last thing, you can’t have any companions along for the ride.” Stated Jump-chan before vanishing and I rolled my eyes, she had to be a spoil sport.

Looking at the list of available gauntlets and looking through the jump catalogue that I had in my mind, I instantly discarded any gauntlets that would be unreasonable to try or had nothing of interest in them. I ultimately chose to take the “Monopoly” Gauntlet first, Monopoly was all about being smarter than your opponents and the Gauntlet, surprisingly, didn’t say anything about perks being removed.

Yes, Loophole detected, cheesing engines engaged.

So, now for the build. I started by selecting “Fast Track” first, which would let me go to the next train station every 5 turns. This was handy and would let me buy them faster. This cost 100 CP, so I was in the minus already.

“Go Already” on the other hand would let me return to Go whenever I hit two sixes. Considering my literally impossible luck, that was pretty much whenever I please to do so. That’s another 200 and now I have minus 300 CP for the Gauntlet.

Next I took both “Cash Advance” and “Rainy Day Funds”, which would double my starting money and later make me more successful in business management, which was nice but cost a total of 900 CP. Yeah, I was getting kinda heavy on the CP.

I skipped the jail related perks, I was beyond lucky, to the point that some had called me Lady Luck in InFamous since I never failed at poker and me investing in anything always seemed to end up in a positive outcome for what I invested in.

Instead of getting Jail breaking perks, I took The Landlord’s Game (400), which would let me buy any field from another player as long as I paid x1.5 the original value of it.

I also got the Real Estate and Mortgage Rates, which combined into 1000 CP of cost and brought me to an account with -2600 CP. However, now I got a house built on every square I owned and a +5% bonus if someone landed on my property with a house, repeatedly, which I assume basically meant they would be increasing the taxes against them repeatedly. Which was handy.

I also bought Home Field Advantage and Savings and Loans, these perks, which were 500 each, so now I had -3600 CP, not counting my potential 400 CP stipend that I could invest from my savings. The effect these had were that I’d already own one square from the start and would manage the bank for the game, taking and giving loans as I saw fit so that was nice.

Now there were the Drawbacks and, well, I was kinda lazy.

So I took Irritable (+100/-3500), Annoyance (+100/-3400), Ankle-Biter (+100/-3300), Just Make it Stop (+200/-3100), Only the Dead Can Know Peace From This (+300/-2800), More of Them (+200/-2600), Too Many Cooks Spoil the Soup (+300/-2300), Drunkards and Draughts (+300/2000), Shrewd Fellows (+300/-1700), Strictly Business (+400/-1300), Trust Busters (+800/-500), Can’t Get in Trouble (+400/-100) and Can’t Catch them, Can You? (+200/100).

This not only filled out my total CP into the positive, but it also increased it by 100. Not that there was anything I wanted to buy from the document there. However, I did decide to do one Mail Order using that 100 CP along with 300 from my account. For “Growth Cheat” from the Reddit Gen Isekai document.

Yes, I cheat. Sue me.

[Insertion]

So, how did this Monopoly game go? Well, for starters the drawback never said how much I had to drink at all, being a bit tipsy was all I needed to be really. Those guys I was playing against? Not so much. They were roaring drunk and made some of the worst decisions imaginable.

After ten rounds I had them pretty much begging for loans, I even gave them out for free just so the game could continue, and they weren’t smart enough to realize that I was basically robbing them at that point. By the time the last one threw in the towel I owned all of the squares and had hotels on each of the ones where they could be built. I also had houses on those you normally can’t build on.

Additionally, I had around 4829 dollar left in Monopoly money when the game come to an end and the figure that was the Monopoly mascot, Rich Uncle Pennybags, congratulated me for winning. Mind you, I was basically cheating because I was literally several hundred times smarter than them, if I lowball myself, and I had an on-command roll double 6 ability, basically. Based on luck alone.

The hardest part was enduring them all, including the drunk children that were part of my “Family” in the Gauntlet. My rewards, other than guaranteed ownership of as many hotels as I had built in the game, as well as the money becoming real, were a nice hat, Rover the Hound piece, and Rich Uncle Pennybags as a mental adviser in all things financial.

Well, best part was that Angelica loved her new pet dog and the elderly brass Dachshound (size roughly like a German Shepherd) loved my little angel as well. The fact that I had basically secured my family’s financial standing in a single jump was a nice little bonus to be honest.

I already had another Gauntlet in mind but before going there I begun a bit of practice, I had 7 days between Gauntlets, that was the rule even though they counted as one jump in this instance. Meaning I had seven days to practice with a gun using my perks, before I had to let the perks go and fight without them.

Just hours before the seven day mark was reached I finally sat down before the machine that served for making my builds and sat down.

I had abused all of my perks that mattered to this to learn every bit about gun control, gun handling and also CQC that I could. Storm, or Typha as she now wanted to be called, helped a lot thanks to retaining her memories and knowledge as a trained soldier in InFamous.

Thus I was fairly confident as I opened the PUBG document.

I feel lazy right now, so I won’t go into much detail but put my purchases here and explain it.

Health Bar (FREE/Mandatory) - Your body is like that of a video game character with a Health Bar. Instead of taking actual physical damage you will have some Hit Points taken from your Health Bar. If your health reaches 0 you are dead. After the Gauntlet you can toggle this On/Off.

Map (FREE/Mandatory) - You have a mini map of the play zone to track your position. Post-Gauntlet the mini map will show the region you are in. After the Gauntlet you can toggle this On/Off.

Auto Pick-Up & Auto Attachment (FREE/Mandatory) - You will collect loot automatically when you move over it and attach all the gear to your guns automatically too. Attachments will be prioritized for whatever configuration you would find optimal, so you won’t end up with a red-dot sight on a sniper rifle unless you really wanted it there. Also just like in the PUBG game you don't have to load bullets into magazines, just remove the used magazine and then insert it back in. After the Gauntlet you can toggle this On/Off.

These were naturally mandatory, couldn’t not take them. But they were also fairly useful in their own way.

Instant Consumption (100 CP) - You can consume anything that you can normally consume like Painkillers and Energy Drink instantly.

This perk was the first non-free perk I got. It was basically a way to skip some of the more annoying parts of item use. Namely the application. Potions had always been this itsy bitsy side of annoying if I was being honest, as they weren’t easy to apply mid-battle.

See Through Walls (100 CP) - You can see silhouettes of people from the other side of walls. These silhouettes are accurate enough you can tell what they’re holding or wearing without issue. You can even hear them speaking through walls too, even if they’re whispering.

This one was a no-brainer, to be honest. It was basically X-Ray Vision with high-level spy equipment rolled into one perk. Basically the Hypervisor integrated into my mind but better.

No Recoil (300 CP) - When you fire a weapon you get no recoil. Whether you are in single shot mode of full auto you sights will stay on target.

Sniper’s wet dream, anyone who doesn’t take this has clearly been shot in the head by some guy in a fancy suit, one too many times that is.

Dead Silent (300 CP) - Whenever you want to you can walk, run, jump, fire a gun, e.t.c. without making any sound.

Silencer the Perk, welcome aboard. No, seriously, this is the best I can ask for.

All Range Expert (400 CP) - You can use short range weapons like they were long range ones without any loss in skill, power or accuracy and vice versa, allowing you to use long range weapons even at point blank range with no

problem.

Sniping Master (400 CP) - You have enough skill with sniping that you can easily headshot a person that is eight hundred meters away, assuming you have a weapon that can reach that far.

Hitscan (500 CP) - Your ranged attacks hit your target instantaneously with neither having to travel the distance nor accounting for bullet drop. You may choose to toggle this effect on/off if you want.

Three perks in a row, if you’re asking why I’m taking these, then you definitely don’t know anything about guns or RTS. Because I’ve had quite a bit of free time in InFamous to play games.

Anti- Armour (500 CP) - Your attacks do increased damage to armour, penetrating much easier and making them breakdown a lot faster.

+ What Armour? (700 CP) - Instead of doing extra damage to armour, your attacks now completely bypass armour entirely. This doesn’t negate natural durability however. You may toggle between this effect and the lesser one as desired.

Two more perks, with a combined cost of 1200 CP. But in exchange I can blue tanks technically up now.

Next were the items:

The Perfect Parachute (Free) - You start every match in PUBG by literally throwing yourself out of the back of an airplane. Thankfully you have this parachute, which will ensure you always reach the ground in a safe and timely manner. It will never malfunction and will automatically deploy at the minimum safe distance in the event you are otherwise occupied or can’t pull the cord. It’s always in perfect condition and resets itself automatically. Post gauntlet it will appear on you and ready to use whenever you want it to if you’re falling in the air.

An improved parachute for free? Gimme. Besides, I don’t want to have even more handicaps here.

A Gun (50 CP) - Instead of running around searching for guns you start out the game with your choice of a sidearm with enough bullets for two full magazines or a crossbow with eleven arrows. This weapon is just a bit better than they would normally be, just a bit faster firing speed, a bit faster reload, e.t.c.

This one was not strictly needed, but having a gun from the start meant I could, technically, snipe at people mid-air which was a good thing for me while we’re descending onto the battlefield.

Armour (300 CP) - You start the game with an Indestructible Level 3 helmet and body armour. No matter where you get hit, it will be as if you got hit on the armoured area.

This was another of those things that you don’t neglect, protection. I was tough as shit but I like to be sure.

Scope Out (200 CP) - You start the game with one of every type of scope in the game. These scopes are just a bit better than they would normally be, and anyone using them has a much easier time aiming and maintaining a good sight picture. Additionally it’s much easier to notice any hidden enemies while looking through one of these scopes.

Training Ground (200 CP) - You have access to an island with instantly replenishing supply of all the weapons/vehicles/e.t.c. to train in before every match for thirty minutes. After this Gauntlet it will become a warehouse add-on that you could visit whenever you want that will have everything you would need to train in anything you want. You may optionally have it populated with simulations of other people, as if you were fighting in a PUBG match again. You won't be able to take any item, that you didn't take in, out of it. Deaths inside, for you or others you invite in, don’t count. In such events the individual in question is simply removed from the training ground, in good health and without injury. This effect will also kick in in the event of incapacitation or if somehow trapped and unable to exit under your/their own power.

Anyone who says “Scopes and Preparation are for Noobs” has no business trying to play a RTS, sniping is one of the best things you can do as a strategy and only idiots would think they should aim for close-quarters engagements or fighting in the open. We abandoned that nonsense in WW1.

Throwables (300 CP) - You start the game with three of each type of throwables available in PUBG those being frag grenades, stun grenades, smoke grenades, molotovs, apples, e.t.c.. These are slightly superior to what could normally be found. Post gauntlet you’ll be able to pull these things out seemingly from nowhere whenever you happen to need one.

Ghillie Suit (400 CP) - More like an invisibility suit. This full-body suit will make you impossible to detect via sight while holding still or moving slowly, whether you are in an area full of tall grass, in an empty desert or standing right infront of another person in a room. Once you start moving faster than a slow pace however it’s more akin to Predator style active cloaking, still incredibly difficult to notice but not entirely impossible. Ceasing movement or slowing down will cause it to revert back to the total invisibility function.

Yes, I also purchased grenades and cloaking suit. Anyone says camouflage is nonsense or shouldn’t be used should read the above paragraph of what I said. Also, maybe you should seek some shelter from snipers in active camouflage fields.

Next are the Drawbacks to pay for all of this.

More Matches (100 CP) - You will have to win one extra match. This Drawback can be taken up to six times. X6= +600

Embarrassing Skin (100 CP) - Good news! You now have a Custom Skin made just for you. Bad news, this new Skin is something you find very embarrassing and you will have to use it. Bunnygirl suit and small child form.

Late Drop (100 CP) - You will drop late from the airplane every match.

Proners (100 CP) - In every match you will encounter at least two ‘Proners’ who you won't be able to spot before they shoot at you, but luckily they have horrible aim by default unless you take the Pro Players Drawback.

+ & Campers (200 CP) - In addition to the Proners you will also encounter at least two Campers each match. Otherwise it's the same as above.

And here we have the first bits of cheese. While this made my day a lot harder, the fact that I drop out last means I will have the opportunity to shoot at people from far above. The skin is really just a case of embarassment and nothing too bad, even if the one I chose would be rather annoying to deal with, and both the proners and “Campers”, would be rather easy to deal with thanks to my purchases and Bodymod alone.

Hot Drop (200 CP) - No matter where you drop, at least 5 more players will drop in the same area every match.

Annoying Dead Teammate (200 CP) - Every match you will have the voice of a dead teammate in your head talking and distracting you.

Red Zone (200 CP) - You will find yourself in every other Red Zone in every match.

For those wondering about why I took those, may I remind you of the above explanation to the last drop part, and that I can run faster than some cars can race?

Fog Matches (300 CP) - The map will be filled with fog making spotting other players difficult.

Teaming Cheaters (300 CP) - Every player/team you encounter will be teaming with two other players/teams.

Glitchy Vehicles (300 CP) - Every vehicle you drive will start to glitch out after some time and can potentially kill.

For anyone wondering why I’m taking these, see my choices of perks, items and Bodymod for an explanation. In short, I can murder players by the buck load easily, vehicles generally aren’t something I need to use, and I’m best in the fog because now they can’t even use the weakness of my camouflage anymore.

Weapons Upgrade (500 CP) - Every player except you will start the matches with air drop only weapons.

No Air Drops (500 CP) - You will never be able to find any air drops.

Not really an issue here for me, since I can just loot them after killing them anyway.

No Downtime (600 CP) - Everytime you stop at a place with the intent to rest for more than seven minutes, a player will sneak up on you and you won't notice them until they fire at you.

And finally, to fill up my build, this one. I didn’t really need to worry about resting, thanks to my Bodymod, so there was no real point to evn contemplate it.

After this I still had 50 CP so I purchased another gun, the first being a P92 handgun, the other being the P18C semi-Auto pistol.

With all that set in stone, I inserted.

First thing I did on insertion was to check out the training area I had purchased. I did this both to test that I could still handle things as easily as I learned before going in but also to test that my new perks and items worked as advertised.

They did, so I went to enter my first match.

It was a massacre, a one-sided, blitz massacre. Between armor having no effect on my shots, my absurd physical stats and my Hitscan perk, I was practically a sniper with a pistol and there wasn’t much that could stand up to that. Best armor in the world? Good luck. Try and find me? No chance.

Of the matches I played, I lost none. It was a 12:0 win/loss rate for me because, at the end of the day, fog obstructs not only my vision but that of everyone else too. And unlike them, I had not only enhanced senses but also the “See Through Walls” perk, allowing me to basically see through obstructions like, say, fog.

Also, I had the advantage of everyone being on the ground before me and thus me having the highground. Whoever thought that was a drawback didn’t think of Star Wars when writing the Gauntlet at all.

Not that the fact I could snipe at other players who were falling underneath me or were on the ground before me, made me popular among the players, they called me a Jump-chan the Hacker because of it. Not that they had any way to prove that much but still.

“You know I find it highly irritating that you were gaming so many Drawbacks at the same time.” Noted Jump-chan when I returned into the warehouse, she looked younger than usual and was sitting with Angelica, playing with dolls.

I smiled, there was also no bite in her words but this just looked too cute. “Thanks for playing with Angelica Jump-chan, I didn’t know you’d be coming to be honest, or I would have tried being faster.” I noted with a smile, picking up my daughter who was still only 4 years old, it hadn’t been more than a few days to be honest.

“No problem, calling her an angel was quite appropriate, and she’s cute as a button.” Noted Jump-chan with a smile as she grew back into her more teenaged appearance. “Anyway, second Gauntlet, another 400 CP banked. Any intention to stop? You gave my PUBG account a rather bad reputation but also put me in the top players list, so I’m not sure if I want you to continue like this.” Noted Jump-chan, looking at me suspiciously.

“Actually, I still want some more CP, and there are some I could get it from easily.” I noted before going to the machine again before turning back to her. “Oh, and if you don’t mind, would you like to babysit Angelica for us a few times during jumps? I don’t really want her to end up in any dangerous situations and it may take a while before she would be old enough to be imported.” I noted as my daughter just looked confused on my shoulder, well, I guess it’s still a bit early for her to understand the conversation.

“You realize I took you into the Jumpchain when you were nine years old, that’s half a Jump away for this little ball of sunshine.” Stated Jump-chan, clearly sceptical of my reasoning.

“Well, sorry Jump-chan, but uyou’re not my mom while I’m Angelica’s mo- umm, I mean, parent. Geez, this is kinda complicated.” I muttered, it was another of those issues of being the sperm origin of my child while being a woman.

“So you say, and it still isn’t a completely fair point because you will likely feel like this even if she’s 14 after the next regular jump.” Stated Jump-chan and I flinched a bit, it was true that I didn’t like the thought of my own daughter risking her life, even if companions revive after a day, I didn’t want her to suffer death at this age. “You know what, I have an offer.” Stated Jump-chan and I loooked up, somewhat suspicious of that offer.

“If you import Angelica during the jump after this Gauntlet run, I will let you choose the jump after that one, with double the base CP and with your banked CP doubled. Sound interesting? I even throw in a Child Protection so that she can never suffer an attack or become collateral.” Offered Jump-chan and I felt suspicion grow. While Jump-chan was an ally, in a way, she was still a random omnipotent being who wanted entertainment. Why did she want this?

However, at the same time, Angelica was my daughter and by that reasoning a very powerful child already. If she really would be untouchable for the relevant jump, then this would be a bargain worth taking, technically. And if I don’t like the next jump?” I sorta challenged, after all, what if the next jump was like Dragonball Z or something?

“Sorry hun, no backsies. Take it or leave it. I would also like to point out that you gave your daughter quite powerful perks and augmentations already, she just hasn’t grown into them yet.” Stated Jump-chan and I glared at her for a second before sighing. If I declined I’d be berating myself later if this next jump would end up being something perfectly harmless.

I sighed, I didn’t like to think about this, but what could I do? “Fine, I guess it would be better for her to understand the chain by first-hand experience, but no skipping her up in age, I want her to at least know a childhood in some way shape or form.” I stated, glaring at the benefactor of mine who smiled at me, way too happy.

“Oh don’t worry, it’s your choice what her build will look like when the time comes, she can’t do it herself after all.” Stated Jump-chan before shrinking back into her child form. “Now, I think you wanted to go to another Gauntlet, didn’t you?” She asked and I sighed, her more childish and cuter voice didn’t fit well with my current feelings regarding her and her manipulations of me.

“Yes, fine. Come sweety, play a bit more with Jump-chan while mommy does some work.” I said, petting my little angel on the head before setting her down after she nodded, before turning to the machine. However, I noticed a notification at the lower right corner of the screen, which had been a Touchscreen for the whole of this set of jumps.

Opening it I found a Supplement of sorts, rather than a Gauntlet or jump. “Jumpchain Gift Shop?” I asked, confused by the title. It was by “Ursine the Mad Bear” apparently, and had been made to accommodate jumpers a bit more.

Looking at the options I frowned, well Bare Necessities would’ve been nice, if I didn’t have that already covered several times over with perks, items and more importantly, the mentioned Monopoly jump above. Stuff would be nice, that’s a lot of money to be paid out in items if I needed to. Two purchases a 5 million dollar budget. But at the same time, this wouldn’t be of any use right now due to me going through gauntlets. I would look at it later.

Then I saw Companion Bodymod, this was a single-purchase item that would let me give my companions access to the Bodymod that I used. There was, quite literally, nothing better I could imagine. After all, that would mean my companions could get a pretty substantial boost to their base power and that couldn’t be taken away by powerloss.

So I paid the 100 CP for it. It would also be nice to have the option for Angelica when the time come. But before that, I would take my next Gauntlet. One that would pay for something else entirely.

3-Minute Cup Noodles Gauntlet.

Yup, I chose the Gauntlet that had the easiest task to complete, the least things I could want, and plenty of Drawbacks that couldn’t hurt me in my goal. Basically, I was going to use this for the sake of Mail Order. Cheesy? Like a Cheddar. Against the Rules? Nope.

So, here is my build:

Variety:

Ramen Variety [Free]: A staple of Japanese cooking, a true ramen can be a religious experience, a mixture of ingredients and broth that is mindblowing. Chefs spend years trying to perfect just the basics… but this is instant ramen. Invented by Momofuku Ando, instant ramen noodles have saved millions from starvation… and millions more from the munchies. Globally known as the ultimate in affordable foods, ramen kicked off the entire instant food culture.

Iron Mouth [100] (Free Ramen): You can eat or drink anything regardless of its temperature without damaging yourself… does not make things otherwise inedible to you edible. Does nothing to stop other parts of the substance from damaging you (poisons are still poisonous… but boiling poisons won’t burn your mouth.) Frozen food might be too hard to chew, but if you can swallow it, you won’t get brain-freeze.

Brand:

Maruchan Brand [Free]: The big name in ramen in the United States, Maruchan is generally considered to be the worst of the name brands for instant noodles… but considering that the generics are much much worse… eh, maybe 24 cents a pack isn’t too much to pay for 200 odd calories.

Food that Brings Smiles to Faces [100] (Free Maruchan Brand): Your food will always be at the ideal temperature when you go to eat it, or when you serve it to others. Furthermore, it will never have too much salt.

Flavor:

Picante [200] (Discount Maruchan Brand): This allows you to tag someone else with the effect of a 200 CP Flavor Perk that you possess. You must kiss them to pass the effect on and it lasts up to 24 hours. They have no control over it. If you have ‘Roasted’ or ‘Intense Flavor’ you can instill it at that level as well.

Drawbacks:

Crowded Tables [+100]: There is no place to sit… no, not even the floor. You will have to eat your lunch standing up. No you can’t go eat at your desk, you don’t have a desk, this isn’t a real company.

ESPN Coverage [+100]: A very loud and extremely intrusive newscaster and cameraman are filming you and broadcasting you making lunch as if it were the sporting event of the century. Smile, you’re being watched by 1.3 billion people worldwide.

Workplace Harassment [+200]: Your boss (or someone you cannot get rid of) will spend the entire 15 minutes yelling at you or flirting creepily with you.

5 Minutes [+300]: You must cook and eat your lunch in only five minutes, which means it will be boiling hot and you will scald yourself.

Take Your Kids to Work Day [+300]: There are now a dozen small children in the breakroom (ages 4-9). They will interfere with whatever you’re doing and ask annoying questions or make fart jokes.

So, now I have 900 CP to use without eating into my banked CP reserves as I still could buy things from visited/frontloaded jumps.

As for why I took all of those, first of all I’m a College Student, or a graduate, technically. I know stress, I know crowded dining areas, and I’ve eaten far worse in the past. Ask my diet at Number 4 Privet Drive for details. Believe me, the moldy food was some of the richest I got back then and I was very happy to be away from there, so eating Instant Ramen? That’s nothing, besides I had it often enough in college and as a Trainer.

As such, yes, I was confident in my ability to enter the jump and only really purchase things through Mail Order. I mean, I can lift two tons so I can certainly survive this much.

As for what I Mail Ordered, I was free to buy anything from previously visited jumps, including Mail Order, without the normal restrictions.

So, I went a bit crazy.

Archives (-800) (Doctor Who (SB))

For 800 CP, though... all bets are off. This is the complete, no-holds barred archive of every single scrap of knowledge ever assembled in the history of this universe. From the blood and magic manipulations of the Carrionites, to the works crafted by the Ancients to bind the Beast, to every piece of Time Lord and Dalek technology, the in-depth studies of Time Lord biologies... the mother lode. It’s all here, everything, ready for you to learn, teach others, and use however you will.

Yes, my first purchase is Doctor Who’s Archives, at the 800 CP level. Yup, I just purchased every bit of Clarketech in Doctor Who. Yes, that´s an absurd level of technology and yes, I only have 100 CP left.

Lastly, I decided that this awful “Paladin of Shadows” jump may still hold some things I didn’t take due to the recommendations. And of what was offered and which I didn’t have yet among the 100 CP offers, only one really stood out:

Nordic Heritage- 100 CP: ​Damn, You look good. Seriously, you’re really, absurdly, stupidly good looking, the kind that gets people to rethink their sexual preferences with just a look, or leave people ruined for other people because they saw the wonder that is you. And this beauty of yours is even more special in that it can never really be tarnished. You could crawl out of mud with tattered clothes and leave the best model in the world, dressed in the finest clothes and with the best makeup work possible, looking like the ugly one in the equation.

So, yeah, I took a appeal perk for a change.

Why? an’t a woman want to look pretty for her lover and do her best to look the best too? Reminder: I’m pretty much married to Cristine, which is also the name she adopted permanently, so excuse me for taking a prettying-up perk like this while I’m getting into a short-duration jump where I don’t need to buy anything from the list with CP.

Anyway, I slotted my build in and was teleported into the lunchroom.

If you thought I would explain some sort of complicated story involving myself and this Gauntlet, then you’ve missed what Gauntlet I took, this is the 3-Minutes Cup Noodles Gauntlet, not one of the action loaded ones.

As predicted I had no issue making it through the lunch thanks to both my durability and endurance, well enough that I didn’t need to worry about silly things like burning my mouth, not to mention that I had picked that perk that prevents such a thing from happening.

At least now I had secured the food supply for us, right?

Link to a Poll

http://www.easypolls.net/poll.html?p=5e1e0161e4b02c7a707abe00

It's Time to Jump! Jump 2: Chapter 2

Chapter 2: In another World with my Wheelchair

Two days were left for my stay in the Warehouse, aside of my studying and practicing my time before the next jump was rather boring.

The housing attachment did do great for living accommodations, albeit I didn’t sleep much so far. The spells I had were just too fascinating, to be honest.

It was during one of these late-relative-night practices in one of the various empty areas of my warehouse, which is to say, about 99% of it, to be honest. I was just about to try and use one of the Null Spells I had found in the book, Program, to make one of the books flap in the air like a bird, when I heard clapping.

“Well, that one definitely found a dedicated little jumper, didn’t she?” I whirled around, my eyes instantly locking on the unknown figure that was standing near one of the empty shelving units nearby. I couldn’t make out this person’s appearance, gender, and the voice had also been kinda androgynous, but I knew that this wasn’t Jump-chan, she like looking human and not so… weird.

“Who are you? Did Jump-chan let you in?” I asked, because who else could do something like that? Or was that another of these benefactors?

“Not quite, your benefactor doesn’t even know that I’m here.” Explained the figure and I tensed, that wasn’t good. “Calm down kid, I’m not your enemy. I’m actually a being similar to your benefactor and I’m here with an offer.” Stated the figure, another Benefactor so… a god? Not sure, as he approached. I knew I stood no chance against anything even close to Jump-chan’s powerlevel, and this thing was bypassing my Clockmaker perk with his… distortion or whatever that was.

“I’m not gonna swap benefactors, Jump-chan’s more than good enough for me.” I instantly responded, not willing to risk anything if this was some sort of test, and it was true, after all I had been taken out of that horrible situation at the Dursley’s by Jump-chan and she had delivered everything that she promised so far.

The figure… uh, laughed in distortion? “Oh don’t worry little jumper, I’m not interested in running my own show. I’m instead here to offer you this.” He stated and before me appeared what looked like one of Jump-chan’s earlier floating screens. It had the Konami Code depicted on it in the middle of the introduction text, which indicated it was a standard supplement made by someone, and 600 CP to buy things.

“The Cheater’s Manual Jupchain Supplement, by Sphere? You know, Cheaters never prosper, right?” I asked, turning to the benefactor and I swear, even though I couldn’t see their face, they were grinning at me.

“Oh don’t worry, these cheats are nowhere near bad enough to trigger Murphy. And they’re perfectly legal actually since third-party intervention isn’t exactly forbidden. Bad form yes, but not forbidden.” Explained the entity and I decided to humor them for now.

The first thing that sprang to my eye was that the perks were all 600 CP in cost and quite a lot of powerful ones, and varied too. Ways to keep powers, skills, items, perks, all there. The last five perks were double in that cost and quite absurd in their own right too. Universal Capstone Booster? Universal Shattered Limiter? A lot of broken stuff in other words.

Items on the other hand were there as well, though they weren’t as broken. There was a “Scaling Weapon of The Slayer, which was a weapon that got stronger with you, Zenith Armor that was basically a semi-living super power armor on steroids. The kind of thing some wacky fanfiction writer made out of Cynti from Sinnoh wearing a Ditto as Power Armor basically.

There were less useful items mostly, but those were the big two though the items section was much more sparse than the perks section.

“Question, is it intended for there only to be enough CP for one purchase?” I asked, looking up at the entity before me. I also had the impression I couldn’t pay with my account, not to mention that doing so would be kinda obvious if Jump-chan wasn’t to know about this meeting.

“Well, it would be quite obvious if you had too many new toys at once, right? That’s why you can only pay for one. You can naturally bank the CP for our next visit, which will be in ten jumps, but where would be the fun in that?” Responded the entity and I rolled my eyes, he had at least a point in what he had said.

I ultimately decided to buy one of the perks, it was rather interesting, if you want a read?

Training Memetically (600 CP) Remember all those kooky ideas people come up with that shouldn't work with a setting's stated capabilities? You can do that now. You can take powers from any world and break their mechanics over your knee just through training. You learn and grow in power faster allowing you to get high tier techniques down within two weeks, not the highest tier but enough to be considered at the Jounin level, to borrow a term from Naruto. You also have a tendency of finding ways to make techniques cost less and be twice as lethal to your opponents. In addition, you can further use those abilities in ways that shouldn't be natural for them to work, even when mixed with other powers they shouldn't play nice with, and not only will they not blow up in your face but they'll turn out far better than you were expecting. As the cherry on top of your game breaking sundae, you can teach others how to do this and everything will be just dandy even after you leave.

So, basically, this was the biggest growth cheat outside of that Reddit Gen Isekai jump. I would be an idiot not to take it.

Cheat Banker, as I decided to name him, then gave his goodbyes and left me to my own devices.

Meaning I now had another two days to work under this new training enhancer.

The first thing I did when entering this jump was basically the same as when I got into the Pokémon world.

Wake up.

I was Harley Parker, 18 years old, top student of the nearby university and daughter of army Seargeant Typhoon Parker, widow, and older sister of Michelle Parker, Middle Schooler.

Yes, my innitials were used, and both Storm and Mi were renamed into... well alright, they were normal enough, though Storm’s name was kind of on the nose about her original name being based on a weather condition. A bad one at that, while Mi kept her full name, just integrated into a more human one.

Sitting up I could feel my joints pop as the memories of this life begun to filter in, I was basically a mega genius, unparalleled by anyone known. I had built my first robot at eight years old, programming a full Machine Intelligence for it before getting my first PC. I had patents on computer technology and earned a hundred million dollars through it. Yes, apparently I brought in the dough for our family.

The reason I was at college, and not had my own huge lab with all the ammenities this entails, working for the government in some capacity, or giving lectures in a university, was that I chose to continue my education at a normal rate rather than skipping in case of missing something that would be good in developing my own intellect and understanding.

I got up and begun to dress, my leg issues were not severe enough that I couldn’t stand, thankfully, but they were messed up enough that it was difficult to stand or run for a prolonged period of time and PA was entirely impossible, so I was excused. I was still not helpless since I could kick people’s ass faster than my problems could lay me low. One-Man Army from Paladin of Shadows does that to you, you know?

I still had to use a wheelchair for longer ways and crutches to not hurt myself on average, it was kinda annoying but it was also a drawback, so I couldn’t do anything about this disability.

Luckily we lived near enough to the college that I could get there with relative ease all things considered, not to mention that my jump identity includes a driver’s license and the knowledge on how to operate a car. Ignoring that I did all the repairs myself and may or may not have built a couple extras in to make it safer.

As I got down to the kitchen from my room, rubbing my legs with a wince since they did hurt a bit from standing and moving while I was getting dressed, I caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror.

Whelp, I’m quite pretty. I had long, black hair, a pretty face, slender figure, despite being able to out benchpress a bodybuilder, dark green eyes and light skin. I was wearing my school’s uniform already, which consisted of a black blazer, Karo-pattern skirt, white, knee-high socks and black shoes. The college I attended, if you couldn’t guess, took a few of it’s standards from Japan as far as the dress code was concerned. For that reason I had a blue ribbon tied around my neck and laying atop my modest bust.

“Hey sis, looks like you’re not blonde this jump.” I blinked, turning around to find Michelle sitting at the table, her pink hair and blue eyes a stark contrast to me. Though in this case, her hair was dyed rather than being naturally Mew-pink.

“And you’re the girl who dyed her hair pink when setting up her build just so she can have her fur color remaining.” I shot back with a smirk, shaking my head. Even the In-Universe explanation was that Michelle was a huge Mew fan, so she decided to be a Mew, dying her hair pink for that purpose. Her eyes were already the right color. She even had a fake Mew tail and ears in her closet!

Which is kinda ironic considering the fact that she’s an actual Mew in a human form. Anyway, I sat down where the food was already mo- I mean, Storm/Typhoon, was in the kitchen, the fact that Piske, the only guy among the whole of my six Pokémon companions that I imported, was a Drop-In meant she was a widow who was raising her two daughters alone. Luckily I had a steady income already and could help support us.

As for what was for breakfast today, it was omelet with bread and some sausage pieces fried into the eggs themselves. The fact that a bird was making eggs for breakfast was kinda odd, to be honest, but she was a human now so, meh. Michelle was naturally talkative, she was an extrovert regardless of form and seeing her not talk 50 mph would be considered odd. Again, she’s a Mew, so that’s also normal.

Mom, because screw the oddness of calling one of my earliest catches my mother, because she is right now, went to work, I had been to the base before so I opened a portal into a secure area and she went through, it was how we decided to do it from here on out, it wasn’t something my in-universe version could do before.

A bit later I also did this for Michelle to her school, before finishing up placing the dishes into the dishwasher before sitting down in my wheelchair and portaling to Chuchu’s place.

“Whoa! Don’t scare me like that!” And I almost ran into her while going through, in the corridor before her apartment’s main door.

Chuchu, or Cristine Cassidia, was a tall, athletic blonde girl of 19 years who, now that I thought about it, looked a lot like my Yellow Alt-Form did at that age, which was kinda odd in my opinion but meh. “You knew I was coming.” I pointed out, raising an eyebrow at her, because our in-jump personas had decided it this way after all the previous day. It was kinda a normal occurrence though my In-Jump persona hadn’t been able to use Portal or Magic in general yet before I come.

“Doesn’t change the fact that you were literally coming out of the wall in front of me. Geez.” She responded, shaking her head.

Luckily she lived in an apartment of her own, her parents, in this universe, didn’t live in Seattle but she went to college here. We had met when my family had lived in that city but moved due to mom’s job and we only saw each other again at college this year. I paid off her student loan and paid half of her apartment rent, by the way. I had the money.

“Don’t be such a prude, at least I can-” I stopped that thought when I remembered one of the many reasons I would pop into her apartment at odd times. “Oh dear Arceus, I’m in a relationship with my Starter Pokémon.” I muttered and Cristine blushed as this memory also popped into her head. We were both Bi and in a, well, the right word would be flexible, relationship. Aka, we dated, we had sex, and we did the same with other people as we wished.

“Well, if you don’t want to anymore… Now that we’re...” Yeah, Cristine was trying to be subtle.

“No, I- ugh, it’s just so odd. At least it’s not like I’m starting this as a virgin.” I muttered, shaking my head. The feelings for her were there, it was part of this persona after all that I had gained.

“So, let’s just live on as we did before inserting ourselves? Or rather, how our other selves did?” Asked Cristine, curiously and I nodded.

“Yeah, let’s do that. Better than breaking up while still having all the feels.” I stated, blushing at the double meaning that could have. “At least I can be the best of both worlds I guess.” I commented and got a laugh from Cristine for it, as well as a dopeslap.

We went to school after that, arriving perfectly on time, and begun to live the life of two college students in this world.

A few weeks went by, as it turned out Amy, name unchanged, hadn’t told me that she set herself into being my older sister at 25 years old.

She was the only one of my family to get caught as a Conduit by the government but got out and now had a lot of blackmail in her hands against them, as well as a lot of favors. She rarely used it but I got a lot of resources and support through her for my various personal projects.

One of them was help installing a reactor I made, it was basically a low-key Zero-Point reactor that drew energy from a contained pocket of subspace and… okay, I admit, this thing is a couple millenia ahead of most any setting. Sue me for installing a generator so we could have power for free. Same for the untraceable internet connection that used the Pentagon’s provider.

Yeah, when you’re an Omega-Level genius whose IQ can be best described in relativity, then you can do shit.

After a few months of study and experimentation, intersected with some… less serious activities involving Cristine, I begun to produce my own merchandise, namely in the form of electronics devices I created with Magitech and Timelord technology.

Thus was born the Jumper C1, a smartphone with a 20:12 centimeter surface, a 4 milimeter thickness, and 2000 Terrabyte internal storage, graphic cards that could handle the most amazing graphics imaginable and any game being something to waste on this graphic card since nothing could come close to it’s capacity, 100% virus security, hacking impervious, compatibility with any and all forms of OS and with it’s own OS included.

Sim cards could be inserted externally and it had charging station on which you placed it to recharge with a battery life of around 72 hours. The phone was also absolutely indestructible, couldn’t be disassembled and blunted any hit dealt with it to avoid it being used as a bludgeoning or even cutting weapon thanks to it’s thinness. The thing was basically space-age and beyond in technology.

The sales were slow at first but once people started realizing what the phones could do, including running full 3D VR games and being untraceable so country-exclusives could be played without an issue, along with a build-in translator that was literally perfect, they begun to be sold as fast as I could manufacture them in my Warehouse.

To do so I transmuted dirt and garbage into raw materials and processed it in a number of manufacturing machines I set up to make the phones. This produced almost 100 phones per 400 kilogram of material I fed into them. I even plundered the garbage dumps for raw materials along with taking any and all dirt, grime and other waste from the oceans that I could filter out of them.

The beaches had never been so clean in my vicinity since forever.

As for what sort of technology I included in these phones, their core consists of two specialized enchanted crystals of a magical mineral I cannot disclose, which possess the special quality that their crystalline matrixes can store and process data at astonishing levels that make modern supercomputers and even the human brain in complexity look like the first ever PCs of this world by comparison, or more like Abacus really.

Iafter the phones become a great hit and a search on internet forums begun to surge, I opened an anonymous website address, Jump-chan.Incorporated.net, and put them on online sale using common American Express for shipping. The bank accounts that the money flowed into was, obviously, my Paladin of Shadows account collection.

Soon after I also released proper PCs, which held several hard drives, each with a capacity of 1000 Tetabyte and graphic cards of the same level as the phones, as well as an OS, Paladin Jumper 1, that possessed the programming codes of any other OS on the market, therefore being compatible with just about any program or game in existence and with a processing power to match.

Like the phones before, these PC were indestructible, could not be taken apart, had unremoveable disc reading slots and about 20 USB slots each, come in 90 different chassi styles and come with pre-programmed packages of programs that could be selected at the website. They also come in laptop and tower form with the latter coming free with specialized monitors with additional ones being 100 dollars each after the original.

They sold for 600 dollars each, as they were that dirt cheap to produce for me. And I’m not even joking about the dirt part here.

The money itself I begun to funnel into aid for cities that had been laid to waste by the outbreaks of Conduits inside of them and R&D projects for medicine and space flight. I also funneled the scientific basics for various advanced technologies to those later ones to speed things up a notch, but didn’t limit it to the US, also sending the same to the UK, Russia and any other large economic powerhouse with a stake in the space programs.

So yeah, I was basically uplifting the place.

By year three computer technology had ascended far beyond anything imaginable by non-OCP origins for this universe in terms of technology and I had begun production of high-resolution game consoles for large companies like Nintendo, Sony and so on. The new Nintendo X for example had now a high-level internet connection that was on par with my mobile phones, which by now had undergone several design upgrades, was basically a larger version of them and could run the sorts of graphics that the Nintendo 64 wished it had been able to create.

It could also connect to the TV but could be used as a handheld console. Games were played by either downloading them off an online store or buying the physical copies that were attached to the top of the console by clipping them on the side of the device. They were very small indeed.

I also provided the game cartridges for these games and got in exchange, for only getting 10% of the sales money, copies of any game I wanted and could even custom order games to my own ideas. I had similar deals with Sony and Sega, by the way, so the consoles were pretty much equal in many regards but featured different styles and game franchises that they sold.

As for the space programs, they had begun sending the first probes to the outer planets that could actually use what was basically termed a “Blink Drive”, which basically used some complicated mechanisms to cause a temporary distortion in time around the vessel to jump it back in time, making it move and use the smaller dimensional size of the universe to traverse space in what would seem like a blink of an eye.

I can’t explain it better, alright?

Anyway, it was around this point that extremists in Empire City begun to attack Conduits and hunt them down. They called for the government to hunt down all Conduits, confirmed or just suspected, and summarily as well as immediately, execute them. And they weren’t alone as in many other places in the US similar calls for “Freak Extermination” were being shouted by a dozen or so very entitled individuals of whom many actually thought that the existence of Conduits was a sign of demonic possession and that those “Afflicted” had to be killed to save humanity.

And I swear, I saw Petunia-motherfucking-Dursley in one of those crowds. Would be perfectly within her character to do something like that, to be honest.

The greatest proponents of this were naturally the Catholic Creationist groups, such as the “Institute of Creation “Science””, Kent Hovind, and most Flat-Earthers. They claimed it was their god’s way of exposing the greatest sinners and for the American people to repentent by putting down those demons.

The worst part was, this split the nation in two. The Government and much of the military leadership, were all in on the containment of Conduits, not the extermination, but the restart of the projects from seven years ago, to turn Conduits into simple weapons of war for America, obedient supersoldiers, basically.

On the other hand, 82% of all soldiers disagreed with this, along with a number of politicians and a few of the senior officers too. Especially those who saw the evils that had been committed seven years ago.

I, for my part, decided that I may as well put to good use my knowledge and technology, those people needed to be stopped after all.

A year after the Conduit Civil War, as some would later call it, commenced, the Anti-Extremist faction of the US military was gifted a ridiculously large amount of shiny new armor and tanks. These suits of armor were Timelord tech Power Armor, it was largely clunky in design and nowhere near what I could have produced if I had more to work with than just the basic ideas of Power Armor and schematics, but they were still extremely strong.

I also included various magical functions into them to ensure they become as powerful as possible but would also become inert once the war was over. I wanted to end this war, not provide the US with superweapons.

The tanks on the other hand were hover tanks with bubble shields and Railguns as well as two machinegun turrets. They were built from the same basic tech base and could take out pretty much any single target in one shot, even a battleship would be unable to even hope winning here.

Additionally I build a large number of autonomous drones that worked as powerful interceptors and fightercraft, before bringing my flying aircraft carrier, [Noble Pursuit] out of the storage where I kept it. Yes, I brought the giant airship out. I also, basically, took command of the rebel forces and continued churning out tanks and power armor.

Within a month we took Washington DC. After two, the Pentagon was conquered. The fourth month saw us capture Air Force 1, along with the president. In the sixth month, the war was over, we had won. And, believe it or not, I was chosen by the rebels to be the new president, at least for a few years if I get voted out after that.

So yeah, at 22 years, approaching 23, objectively 34 really, I become the president of the United States of America. I still reduced the number of operational suits and tanks to avoid provocation and moved my seat of government onto the [Noble Pursuit], which had been since nicknamed [Sea Force 1] as a joke to the fact that it was a functional aircraft carrier, not an airplane.

Luckily, while this gave me butt loads of new work on top of my school time, I had all the dedication I needed to do so, and didn’t need much sleep either.

I started by purging the extremist elements from the US, taking down the institutionalized Creationist groups and dismantling the various “Schools” that really only served the purpose of indoctrinating children to obey the church. Meaning my lowest popularity ratings were in Texas. Kent Hovind was tried and found guilty, like most that had voiced their “Conduits are Demons” thoughts, of creating the riot in the first place and for attempted genocide against all conduits.

I had his entire assets, along with those of the various Creationist movements, sacked and pulled into scientific fields to further those. I also opened dialogue with the UK and Russia, revealing that I had been the one that had shared with them the scientific principles they had been using so far, as well as being the source of the advanced computer technology.

My cabinet on the other hand, I may add, consisted largely of my companions. Mom become Secretary of Defense and general staff chief. My VP become Cristine, as well as becoming First Lady because, well, we’re adults now and I actually found that I enjoy it. People still scratched their heads when we announced Cristine pregnant by me after two years.

Amy become head of my Secret Service delegation who were the guards for me. No one needed to know that we were also, umm, let’s leave it at “Friends with Benefits”.

…

What? I told you I’m for Polygamy as is my current persona. Geez.

Anyway, Piske joined the same agents, it wasn’t hard for me to justify appointing my own people to it and he was a skilled fighter.

Lastly was Bianca who become head of my personal fighter wings aboard the [Noble Pursuit], who flew N23 Star Hawk Aero-Space Fightercraft. Yes, early spacefighters.

Oh yeah, about that child me and Cristine had, Angelica was born a beautiful little girl, blonde like her womb mother but with my eyes. I had intentionally let her have a number of my own intelligence and strength perks, along with the conduit powers which, surprisingly, she would manifest as a dual-affinity for ice and electricity.

By the time elections rolled around again I found myself at the head of a new golden age for the US, with technology and health as well as the economy, booming so hard it knocked the Baby Boom era out of the water for most prosperous era in the states.

We even had a habitat set-up at Mars for crying out loud!

Well, what does this mean for the elections? 96% votes for me, the rest divided between Liberal and Conservatives evenly. Yes, I knocked the competition out of the fucking ballpark. I had been ready to give up the presidency if I had been elected out, but president Harley Parker would remain in power until my Jump ended, at which point I had created the first interstellar starship, [Graceful Voyager], which was crewed by the US, UK and Russia evenly.

Our goal? One of three inhabitable planets we had found with the Blink Drive Probes, within reasonable distance from Earth. They would be the first interstellar colonists of Earth, of the human race in fact. The ships were armed with Railguns, Rayguns and even several nuclear missile silos in case of hostiles, but that wasn’t expected.

And when the jump ended, the polls come in, with another overwhelming majority, this time 99.9999%, in my favor. “I guess I’ll be president for a little while longer.” I noted in bemusement as time stopped and the jump ended.